Random – Page 3 – Brian Fence

2016 & …?

I have not blogged in ages.
I haven’t written in ages.

Poor Lenna!

As I mentioned in my last post, I did scribe the ending to Freewoman, the final book in Lenna Faircloth’s trilogy. Of course, all that did was garner a surfeit of queries as to when the book was coming out…

Well. My urge to kill Lenna is only mild at the moment, so 2016 is still looking ever so rosy. Mainly, though, I’ve been preoccupied with numerous Big To-Dos, like moving, the holidays, and getting the kittens to stop trying to maim each other. (See above: a rare moment of peace.)

I have set aside some “staycation” time so that (1) we can unpack the kitchen and pretend to bake like Mary Berry, and (2) I can stop fretting myself prematurely grey.

TL;DR version:

Freewoman is on its way; I am turning silver; I go to the gym a lot; I do not dance nearly as much as I should; three cats is a bit much for two people.

Writing Getaway; Or: Writing, GET AWAY!

The boy had the sudden (whether it was opportune or not is debatable, since we had to wake up at 4:30 this morning) task of traveling for work up to Connecticut, and as I’ve been going a bit stir-crazy of late and may have been on vacation this week anyway, I said, “BAO GOES TOO.” This was very exciting, especially since it came off the back-end of pumpkin picking. Pumpkins are a particular… fascination of mine.

Fortunately, despite the chilly weather, heated car seats and a Xanax meant I snored through most of the journey, and now I’m wandering about like a lost puppy in this giant resort. (I have had to ask for directions twice and already have been asked if Sunset Shimmer was my good luck charm.)

Good news is! While under normal vacation circumstances I would most likely be drunk or eating the entire time, I’ll be spending most of the week cranking out the first proof of Freewoman and working on two separate serials for my favorite magician, Jacob Orange. Productivity, here we come! (Mostly. Right now I’m having a Cosmopolitan and considering spa treatments.)

…oh, me.

A Rant; Or Rather, an Angry Diatribe about GoT

Okay, as a writer, I understand that there are scenes that move along plot and are sometimes hard to write and can be quite visceral to readers. Sometimes, that is the point of writing those scenes. Hell, I was asked if I’m just killing off gay characters because they’re gay (don’t worry; I’ve knocked off 3 straights in book three already!).

But the Game of Thrones HBO adaption is gratuitous in its violence against women, both adult and young. I’m not even on the finale yet and I’m appalled by this season (compounded with others). Yes, men meet horrible fates too, so you don’t need to berate me about Theon Theon Theon and his lack of a tallywhacker. There is just such an overt sexualization and abuse of women in this series that it leaves me gobsmacked that people aren’t made uncomfortable watching this.

We have a responsibility to recognize, learn, and stop the atrocities that have been afflicted on women historically, but this drama is *NOT* history (though Martin and others claim it’s all inspired by historic events such as the War of the Roses — and subsequently explain away how this level of violence is fine and dandy).

This is a fantasy show with horrific pacing and horrific acts of violence against women just for shock value, and it just gives me pause when I think, “…why are people entertained by this? Is this what we want to see?” Because I can guarantee one thing… it certainly isn’t teaching anyone about equality, history, or the horrors real women all over the world suffer daily. It’s glorifying these awful events as entertainment.

I haven’t watched the finale yet, but I’m already so uncomfortable I had to leave the room. And there is no come back that says, “The finale will make everything better.” Because no. The rape, the abuse, the misogynistic sex — hell’s bells, what on earth are people enjoying about this and what the hell kind of people write this?

Feel free to disagree — I don’t mind and don’t mind anyone who likes GoT. I just can only watch so much rape or murdering of young girls before I get angry. And for the die-hard fans, Arya Stark doing something AMAZING eventually is not going to make up for all of the treacherous treatment of women by this series. Yes, bad stuff happens to all sorts of people in Game of Thrones, but you’d have to be blind not to see that this mostly happens to women. This show sells abuse.

Okay, rant over. Sorry… but not so sorry for saying what every man and woman should be saying. *clicks post because, unlike Theon, I’ve still got and deserve my junk*

Such May-ness

Yikes! It’s been forever. I did not exactly fall off the planet, but I got quite close to the Moon. More on that — and the poems that resulted from it — to be covered another time.

Apprentice (hardcover) went live back in December, though due to a panoply of ponderous circumstances, I didn’t get to promote it much (or at all). Don’t worry: that’ll change very soon, starting with some giveaways that I’ll announce in a few days. 🙂

On a fanciful note, MasterChef Australia is currently my snuggly lifeline to sanity; even the cat — more on him another time, too — knows not to eat the houseplants during my nightly voyage into the world of Ozzie home cookery.

And while we’re on the topic of food, I just got back from my St Cross reunion in Boston. (It was a complete blast to reunite with Oxford peeps and then faff about Harvard Square in an awesome hat.)

Anyway, because I’m compelled to go to dive bars with scrumptastic reputations, yours truly found himself at a biker bar in Derby, Connecticut eating food (in a completely INAPPROPRIATE HAT) that could drop an elephant at 20 paces.

Behold the gloriousness of the Parmesan Butter Bacon Garlic Burger, courtesy of the Dew Drop Inn:

…this probably explains my lack of appetite for the last few days. Burp. Keep it classy, kids, keep it classy.

West Coast Inspiration

So yes, I’m on one of my retreats to the West Coast! Humidity and nasty heat claimed my East Coast Pine Forest like a Texan noms on barbecue, so the immediate desire to flee to a place with better weather and a different sort of energy consumed me. I also had to see a man about a cat.

I’ve been slightly detached from the blog and even Apprentice itself as I experienced one of the rare joys a published author is afforded — nothingness. Sure, the thoughts were still bursting around in the head (I’m not sure that ever stops for a writer), but with the manuscript off to the copyeditor, I could very happily divorce myself from worrying about book two for a few weeks. It’s NICE.

But then you get the itch. I had planned to get some writing done while away, but it wasn’t the hugest of my priorities. Then, as I took a two hour stroll (me, strolling, two hours, I know) along China Beach and Land’s End, BAM! It happened. Book three (I already have a lot of it outlined, so it’s not like I’m starting from scratch) has its first proper words. Rather, its first proper scene! Chapter one, scene one, written. And I am pleased. 🙂 Lenna’s ending draws nigh, but at least we see the return of some fan favorites…

Don’t worry… not all is what it seems! In any case, while I nurse my sunburn and cook my rabbit (really — I have a rabbit to cook), know that I’m writing/living/working/loving just so I become a better Brian for all of you supporting me back home, here, and abroad! I miss you all so much!

Book three, here we go.

Book Three - Beginning

Reset the Net

A lot of my friends and family members don’t seem to realize how vulnerable they leave themselves in regard to Internet. I’m not just talking about ‘hackers’ or those ‘nasty viruses’ you get from downloading porn (you know who you are): governments and corporations also use loopholes and dubious means to extract what we think is private.

Sign the petition and get the privacy pack. Protect yourself; reset the net.

Out of the Box

I’ve been a bit silent lately, I know. One would like to think that’s because I’m knee-deep in Apprentice edits — which, by all means, is where I should be — but the truth is that I’ve been contracted to do some translation work in Manhattan. The commute from the moon is insane. MERG.

I don’t even have time to put my ponies back in their pony-box, and so they gradually start to assemble around my keys, sayings, “No, Brian… don’t leave us!”

Pony Control — They are holding my Magic Mouse captive.

Worry not; though! Tomorrow is the last day. I WILL FINISH THE BOOK THIS WEEK. REALLY.

All I have to do is survive tomorrow.

Dear Christina

This is not a love letter. It is not a manifestation of a new personality. In fact, Christina happens to be the lovely receptionist at Fred Astaire Manasquan, where I learn dance moves with fancy names like “twinkle to grapevine” (I’m dead serious; that’s a move).

Dear Christina: the other day you told me you weren’t sure what to write in a blog, asked me what I write about, and how often I update my blog. I’m not sure I answered very well. Then I told myself I simply had to post something today, as I haven’t in some time, and I found that I, too, have no idea what to write.

I could babble about my experience at the Snowflake Showdown, which was both terrifying and exhilarating (wink wink, Christina: there’s a blog topic for you); perhaps readers might want to hear how I leveled up Agnès in Bravely Default to a level ten White Mage (highly, highly doubtful). I might also divulge that the increasing muscle mass on my calves has caused me to split a pair of trousers (pictures forthcoming).

On a more grounded note — this is where I use the blog for its intended purpose of progress updates (Christina!) — I am mentally prepared to finish up Apprentice so it looks we’re still cruising along the track toward a summer release, though not May, as was the case with the first novel. I just really have to buckle down and write the heck out of a few scenes. I think a trip to the pub is in order.

Ultimately, though, Christina, my muse of the day, when you feel like you have to blog but don’t have much to say, just post a picture of a cat like the rest of the internet.

Our Time Has Come

Love Smells of Bacon and Overdue Blogging

Happy Valentine’s Day!

A lot of people hate the commercialization of the holiday — or the fact that it’s a holiday at all — but I still like the idea that there’s a day where we’re forced to stop and think about the people we love, even if those people aren’t necessarily romantic interests, but friends, family, and woofers too (though romantic interests are wonderful for obvious reasons).

Lurve is Like a Red, Red Rose — Somekitteh lurves me!

My scent du jour is BACON, as in BACON BROWNIES, which I’ll be happily distributing to the super friendly staff at my dance studio, Fred Astaire Manasquan. Sorry for anyone who isn’t in close physical proximity to taste these curious nibbles, but I do have another treat in store!

FIVE CODES THAT ARE REDEEMABLE AT AUDIBLE.COM FOR A DIGITAL EDITION OF THE AUDIOBOOK OF LIBRARIAN!

First-come, first-serve basis, so snatch ’em up and please leave a review/share with a friend!

1. Visit http://www.audible.com/at/redeem
2. Enter the download code into the “Redeem Your Promotional Code” field and click “Redeem”.
3. If you’re not an Audible customer you’ll need to create a new Audible.com account. Don’t worry, you can use your Amazon account to do this.
4. Follow the instructions. You’ll have 1 credit applied to your account.
5. Go to Librarian‘s Audible page.
6. Add it to your cart. When you check out you’ll see an option to apply the free credit.

And, without further ado, here are the five codes. If one of them doesn’t work, it means someone beat you to it (so read my blog earlier). 😉

T9BKPAL2LCWCH
5EHDF37CZ6WN5
5CFQ84MRKZDZJ
YCFDFR4YB35EZ
USKCMNDUEGKQK

Happy Valentine’s Day!

xoxo

Bao’s Book of Medicine

Those who are lucky enough to bask in the gloriousness that is my company know that seldom am I taken ill. Colds, cough, flu, even TB (much to my dismay: I planned on going out, hacking and sputtering, with the consumption for some time now) bounce off, though this past weekend left me in bed sneezing my brains out. I even rescheduled a dance lesson. Gasp.

Perhaps I wasn’t prescribing to my own advice: drink a cold away. Yes, rule number one, if you feel sick, take a suitable amount of vodka to sterilize and kill all those bacteria/germs. This has the wonderful side effect of making you feel good as well. And for those of you worried about reactions like the so-called “hangover” — worry not; just start from step one and soon you’ll be feeling fine again. Forever.

Shining Armor and Bao's Magical Mystery Cure — Shining Armor doesn’t just prescribe… he DIVES into Bao Medicine!

In any case, I spent most of the weekend feeling like something Elvira would watch (and, probably, looking not far removed from it, too). I think I got zero work done, which means this week — the week where I seem to have something to do every night — I really have to pick up the pace and sort out Apprentice. That book needs finishin’!

Fingers crossed, we’ll have something rough-and-tumble by the end of February. Hopefully.